candy cane
Bill Gates Writes A Letter To Santa

 Dear Santa,  
   
 How are you doing? I hope you've had a successful year and have  
 come up with a lot of interesting toys. It's really neat how  
 you're able to do that year after year. I guess that's how you  
 stay number one in the Christmas presents business.  
   
 Actually, I admire the way you run Christmas. You really have a  
 handle on it. You find out what people want (with letters like  
 this and having kids tell you in person), and then you make the  
 presents and control how they are delivered. It's an impressive  
 operation.  
   
 I also like how you've got it to where when somebody says,  
 "Christmas presents," people automatically think Santa Claus.  
 What a marketing advantage. Best of all, even though you're a  
 huge success, people still don't know much about your private  
 life. It's just rumors. That's so neat.  
   
 I think being at the North Pole helps. That was a good move. For  
 example, when you're designing toys, only your elves know what  
 you're doing, and you're way up there where nobody can spy on you  
 and steal your ideas. And even if they do, you can always just  
 let it out that you're making the same stuff to bring to people  
 for free, so why would they buy the other guy's stuff?  
   
 Also, other people who make Christmas presents can't deliver them  
 like you can. Yours is the only sleigh on the distribution  
 highway. You must get some great discounts from suppliers,  
 because if they don't play ball you can just refuse to give out  
 their presents. Very Sharp.  
   
 What I don't get is why you give away stuff. That's the dumbest  
 idea I've ever heard. I admit, its why you're number one - who  
 could compete with a deal like that? But it must make it hard to  
 stay in business, especially when you have to visit every kid in  
 the world. You have to keep growing or fail.  
   
 Here's an idea on how you can help finance your operation: Give  
 everybody at least one present at Christmas, then you could make  
 batteries and sell them the rest of the year. It would create a  
 demand: You give people something and then sell them what they  
 need to make it work.  
   
 Another thing, about you coming down the chimney. That's so slow  
 and inefficient. And what about all the people who don't have  
 chimneys? Santa. I have one word for you: windows. Everybody has  
 windows.  
   
 That's about all I have to say. You're probably wondering if I  
 was good or bad this year, but I don't really like to talk about  
 my personal life, if that's O.K. (Just out of curiosity: When you  
 were a boy, did any of the other kids call you a nerd?) Anyway, I  
 don't really have anything to ask for. Mostly I think up  
 something to play with and then build it myself. I guess I'm sort  
 of like you - I make my own toys.  
   
 Best of luck, Billy Gates