More Jokes (Misc)

Choose a joke from the menu on the right or read on for a couple of our favorites.

What Time Is It?

Exhausted from driving, a traveling salesman stopped in this one town, and pulled over to get an hour or two of sleep. But, as luck would have it, the quiet place he chose happened to be one of the streets that the majority of the towns people used to take their daily run.

The salesman had barely pulled over, and gotten comfortable when a jogger was knocking on his window, asking, "Excuse me, but do you have the time?"

The man looked at the car clock and answered, "8:15."

The jogger said thanks and left.

The man settled back again, and was just dozing off when there was another knock on the window and another jogger. "Excuse me, sir, do you have the time?"

"8:25!"

The jogger said thanks and left.

Now, the man could see other joggers passing by and he knew it was only a matter of time before another one would be disturbed him. Hoping to solve his problem he took out a pen and paper and put a sign in his window saying, "I do not know the time!"

Again he settled back to sleep, and was just dozing off when there was another knock on the window.

"Sir, sir? It's 8:45!"

Wacky Definitions

Gravity: Not just a good idea, it's the law!

Gross ignorance: 144 times worse than normal ignorance.

Clock: A small mechanical device to wake up people without children.

Karaoke: A Japanese word meaning "tone deaf".

Opera: Where a guy gets stabbed in the back and sings about it.

Racial prejudice: a pigment of the imagination.

Normal: A setting on a washing machine.

Health: The slowest possible rate of dying.

Poverty: Having too much month left at the end of the money.

Boy: A noise with dirt on it.

Sleep: That fleeting moment just before the alarm goes off.

Cynic: Someone who smells the flowers and looks for the casket.

Witlag: The delay between delivery and comprehension of a joke.

Skier: Someone who pays an arm and a leg to break them.